Discovering Myself

1. Don’t work yourself to death. Set some boundaries when it comes to your work life. Predetermine certain days of the weeks, or hours of the day when you only focus on yourself or your family. Instead of causing you to fall behind, this will actually help you work more efficiently during the rest of the week.
2. Don’t let regret enter your life. The things in your past have already occurred. You have no power to change these things. Why then, do so many of us allow regret to throw us off of our balance? Living in the present, and enjoying each moment as it occurs, is one of the easiest ways to enjoy more spiritual and mental balance in your life.
3. Don’t take on too much. It is hard for many of us to delegate responsibility to others. Whether it is at work or in the home, we become victims of the “I’ll just do it myself” mentality. The result is that we spend too much time focusing on certain aspects of our lives while neglecting others. We quickly forget that everything is a trade-off. Learn to delegate to co-workers, family members and your spouse. Return the favor for them to achieve an even greater balance.
4. Treat yourself to something nice. Many times we don’t reward ourselves enough. While it is kind and decent to always try to put other people first, this should not come at the expense of our own well-being. If you work hard, reward is the proper balance to putting forth that effort.
5. Be nice to others. In order to achieve real spiritual fulfillment, one must rise above the fray and…just be a nicer person. Acting with kindness to other human beings has a “pay it forward” effect that not only makes you feel good, but improves the world around you as well.
6. Get organized and reduce clutter. Sometimes, we look back on a particularly busy day and ask ourselves, “what, exactly just happened here?” Lives filled with too much clutter and racing around from Point A to Point B are going to lead to stress and health issues. Take a day and get organized. Prioritize your life. Like a garage sale, it may be time to get rid of some things that are cluttering up the corners of your life.
7. Get back to basics. For many people seeking balance, there’s nothing better than the traditional arts of meditation, yoga or acupuncture. All three can provide a pathway to spirituality and greater union of the mind, body and spirit. In a stressful, ever-changing world, constants such as these can be an ideal way to achieve balance.
8. Be positive. Far too often, a negative attitude can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Or to put it another way, when we keep focusing on bad things, they often end up happening. Positive, upbeat people have a clearer point of view and generally speaking get more of what they want out of life…including proper balance.
9. Exercise often and eat right. A healthy body is the quickest way to a healthy mind and spirit. Proper nutrition provides the fuel for exercise, which in turn enhances every aspect of your life.
10. Have more fun. Many experts assert that consulting with your “inner child” as often as possible is the key to striking a harmonious balance in life. You remember your inner child, right? The little person who understood the simple pleasures of life and the importance of play? Get back to that child today and find out how you can inject some activities that aren’t so serious into your day to day existence.

These are the 10 essentials of gay dating.  I don’t go for the stereotypical shit…

1. Attractive:  This is very subjective, if you don’t find the other person attractive, don’t waste your time.  It must be a mutual thing.  You can still be friends with people you aren’t attracted to, so don’t discount them as a friend, but be clear that you don’t find them attractive in a sexual way early on.
2. Respect:  You need to have respect for the person and they should also respect you in the same way.  This could be as little as helping clean up after dinner to something more important like jokes told in the company of friends.
3. Go Dutch:  You should never pay for the other person to start off.  You should both be able to pay for yourselves and be comfortable in your own lives.  It seems to be the trend in the gay community for one person to pick up the tab, I’ve fallen victim to this too many times.
4. Trust:  This one is built over time, but you should have trust that you will adhere to whatever boundaries you decide the dating will fall into.  I, for instance, believe in a monogamous relationship.  I don’t want anything coming into my house or body that I don’t know.  That includes diseases.
5. Boundaries:  Again, you must both set the boundaries of the relationship.  What you both expect to get and to receive.  This might seem tough to do when you start dating, but it needs to be dealt with early.
6. Location:  You should not mind traveling between the two places of dwelling.  If it’s not feasible it needs to be discussed.  Long distance relationships are hard and humans just aren’t built for those.
7. Communication:  You should both be able to communicate effectively with each other.  This is VERY important in any relationship.  Effectively communicating needs and wants are essential to a healthy life.
8. Shared Ideals:  You should share some of the same ideals.  Life, family, love, and the like.
9. Hobbies:  This is not essential, but it helps with conversation and things to do.  It’s nice to share some of the same hobbies, but you can also develop these along the way.  Essentially, you should like doing things together, regardless of what it is.
10. Friendship:  Try to develop a friendship before you get to the more meaningful parts of a relationship.  You should want to hang out with this person more than your other friends.  If not, then it probably won’t last.